Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Why I Stand on the Edge

Many people have asked me over the years why I'm so different. Many people have called me weird, peculiar, odd, strange...take your pick. People don't understand my need to buck mainstream society and stand on the edge. This is something I recently wrote in response to all their comments.

ON THE EDGE
I stand on the edge, because I choose to,
Because I have chosen to follow the calling
You appointed for me.
Not many understand why I choose to stand on the edge.
They don't understand that You have given me the ability to balance.
It can be a precarious position at times,
Even downright scary,
But I know You will never let me tip over the edge.
And I know I won't fall,
Because You are holding me up.

I see those who are over the edge,
And I reach for them.
I tell them this is a safe place,
And I reach out my arms to grab them.
Those toward the center don't understand my method.
They don't understand my need
To stand on the edge.
But they aren't called to be on the edge.
Those who aren't called to it
Can't understand it without Your help.

I know You choose not to let them understand,
Because being an outcast is part of the package of this calling.
You knew that those over the edge would not accept me
If I was accepted by those toward the center.

At times it hurts to be rejected
By others who serve You.
It hurts to be accused of not following You.
It hurts when they ask me why I'm not like them.
They don't understand that I'm being like You.

I display an aspect of Your character and personality
That those toward the center
Would rather not think about.
They like to keep You in the boxes they've made for You.
Long ago, I broke the box I was keeping You in.
I smashed it to pieces so I couldn't put You back in it.
And You've taken me to places
I never dreamed possible.
We've been on a wonderful, difficult, painful journey together.
And You have never disappointed me,
But always surprised me.
Thank you, my Love.

Always Yours,
Lily

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